More on: Dating In Our 40's Like We Were Still In Our 20's

A buddy of mine and I were recently talking about the difficulty of raising daughters. Disclaimer-Back in the ‘before-time,’ he and I both behaved badly in some relationships. We both had little black books, with large numbers of entries, and consciences with short memories. At some point both of us were *itch-slapped by different ladies that showed us what it was like to be on the receiving end of being played. We eventually got gospel.


So this message is for all daughters, sisters, aunts and mothers, from 16 to 76.

Never Be Rule # 6: The way some men think about women, is similar to how we think about food. Scene 3, take 2; a nice restaurant in Any town, USA. A gentleman is with his date, and he his looking the menu over. He turns to the dinner section, as he requires a meal of substance. He peruses the seafood, the beef and lamb, pasta, lasagna and main dish salads.

Scene 4: The gentleman wants his meal to last, so he orders the meat or fish as his main course, then moves on to consider side dishes and condiments. He orders a nice, rare filet mignon, and the waiter compliments him for having made a fine choice. The waiter then explains that the main dish comes with a lite salad, and two side dishes- redskin potatoes and okra.

Scene 5: Once served, the gentleman focuses on the filet and redskin potatoes as he enjoys his dinner, only occasionally getting around to the salad. He never even touches the okra. As the end of the meal approaches, his date asks him why he hasn’t eaten his okra. He responds by saying-‘I have to be in the mood for something slimy to eat okra.’

Scene 6: The waiter returns and asks how the meal was, and if he’ll be ordering desert. Despite his fullness, the gentleman chooses cherries jubilee (there is something about men and cherries you see).

Whether he eats in, or takes the desert home, he will get around to his desert. The okra on the other hand, will find its way to the garbage container with all the other distasteful refuse and disposable menu items, which had no value during the meal.

The take-home lesson:

If you cannot be the filet mignon, then be the cherries jubilee. But never, ever, allow yourself to be anybody’s okra.

The Cult of Political Personality

Who gave us the right to intercede on either side of this civil war? We sat on the sidelines while Tunisia, Egypt, Yemen, and Bahrain sorted their situations out, why did we 'Bush' Libya? Once again the politics of personality and the politics of oil reveal themselves.


Gadhafi and Fidel have always been on our 'hater' list for standing up to the big bad US of A (assholes). Our government is so capricious-we did nothing in Rwanda, nothing in Darfur, and seem to be completely ignoring the unrest in the Ivory Coast. Our policy should be called what it is-missiles for oil.

We look away while oppressive governments reign over their people so long as we receive some strategic, political, or financial benefit. The moment that dynamic changes, that friend becomes a pariah, and we suddenly get gospel and want to kill them. I am too often ashamed by our government's actions these days. Bush or Obama, it makes no difference. The entire system is run by the wealthy elite-welcome to the New/Old World Order!..

tnasiti's two cents: Valentine's Day: Dating Over 40 As If We're Under 20.

tnasiti's two cents: Valentine's Day: Dating Over 40 As If We're Under 20.

Valentine's Day: Dating Over 40 As If We're Under 20.

The dating rules didn't really work when we were 20, so why do we still use them at 40? Girl holds prize, guy jumps thru hoops for prize. 3 months later relationship over, girl feels used, guy feels resentment for letting himself be led around by his *ick. That old paradigm continues to direct our relationships.


Result; Today women want commitment before relationship, instead of a relationship that could possibly lead to commitment. Go figure.

Ladies, it isn't fair to expect a guy to negotiate your mine field, avoid the quicksand, and swim the crocodile infested moat, only to beg you to let down your Rapunzel-hair for him to climb. Meanwhile you relax and watch his progress with a smile, and maybe cheer him on?

Guys, how is that we're still trying to nail every plank with a crack in it? At what point do we mature beyond leading with our....libido? At 19, it was almost understandable for us to think with the little head, then the big head, the heart and maybe our ethics-in that order. At this stage of life, we should first listen to our hearts and minds, our ethics-and finally our libidos. This is the honorable way to treat women and to treat ourselves. Honor-now that's a word you don't often hear these days.

Suggestion:

Guys; let us dance thru the mine filed, brave the quicksand, and then find a seat at the edge of the moat.

Ladies; tie those Rapunzel-locs to the bars and lower your own butt down, then jump into the moat, and beat that crocodile to the other side.

Guys, we'll then rise from our seat as a gentleman should, and help that wonderful lady out of the moat, preferably before she loses a limb. I know, I know, some of you bastards wouldn't care, as long you got the rest of her out, right (kidding, just kidding)?

But seriously people, if guys acted a little more reserved with our sexuality like the ladies, and if the ladies were a little less concerned with reputation, and relied more on their 3 or 4 decades of experience instead of a list of hurdles, we could meet each other somewhere in the middle. Sound fair?

These thoughts are with me as we celebrate a day created, let’s face it-to make a dollar. We should not need an ad man to remind us to honor our partners and to do something special for them-men and women alike! Perhaps a day to start each season would make more sense, because we tend to get caught-up with living. We lose focus on what is ultimately most important-each other. The couple is the basis of all society. Let's act like it, and start treating each other with honor.